wrestling:with:truth

Over the past couple of weeks I have been coming to grips with my own humanity. I am realizing more than ever before how capable I am of making big, not just big, but HUGE mistakes. I feel as I have become older my safety net is being pulled back and or disappearing all together. For so long I have felt that God had my back in all situations and would help me get out of tough situations. However, now that I am older and theologically educated I am realizing that yes, God still has my back, however, I am more aware of how much power and decisions God allows us to have in our lives.

I have the option to choose. To choose what I know is right. Or to choose what my flesh desires. It is in these moments I am realizing the darkest parts of myself. The parts I wish were not there. I have never been so aware of my sinful nature as I have been in the past four to six weeks.

For those evangelicals that need this part… yes, this is why I need a Savior.

But, if you are caught up on the fact that we need a Savior for us to realize those dark parts of our lives than you have missed what I am saying. I know I need to be “saved” from those dark areas and I have been; yet it does not mean they go away.

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” I. Pt. 2:9

My problem with this verse is just because you have been set apart doesn’t mean your problems were set apart with you. You have been given the right as a human being, not a robot; to choose which way you want to go. It’s not easy. I mean can you imagine if you chose Jesus and all your problems went away? Everything was just set up and you had to just live life?

No thanks, that does not work for me. So I guess I’ll take the ________ pill.

p.s. If you want to debate context I’m well aware of what the passage is talking about. So do not waste your time trying to tell me Your context.